How Barney Met Lily
by moon12345
Summary: Just what the title says, a little one shot of how Barney met Lily.


**How Barney Met Lily**

Kids, you know how I met Marshall and Lily, how I met Robin and Barney, how Marshall met Lily, how Marshall met Barney, how Robin met Lily. But I believe there is one other story I haven't told you yet. So here is the story of how Barney met Lily. It was the year of 2001, just a few weeks after I met Barney myself…

"He's cheating on his girlfriend, again? With the _same_ girl?"

We were at the bar that night. It was the only place we ever seen Barney those days. I sat with him at one of the tables (we didn't own the booth yet), watching Marshall and Lily talking by the bar counter. Barney looked over at Marshall in wonder and shock. He had been following him all week, doing everything he said, because he believed Marshall to be some God of womanizing.

"I mean, what is it with this guy? He seems so… regular and not at all awesome, but then he goes and does… this!" he pointed at the couple who started kissing.

"Yup," I said, laughing. "That's why he's my best friend."

Barney turned sharply to look at me. "I'm your new best friend," he reminded me. I don't know how, even back then, he had the idea he could be my best friend after only a few weeks of knowing me. "And new is always better."

"Marshall's my best-" I tried to tell him, but he held up his hand to stop me.

"New is _always_ better."

Just then Marshall and Lily came over with their drinks, and sat down at our table.

"Dude," said Barney with glee in his eyes. "You're cheating on your girlfriend," he told Marshall, making Lily snicker. "And _you_ ," he turned to look at the redhead, pointing his finger at her. "Why be a home wrecker when you could be with someone way more awesome, and way more single, as me?" he winked at her.

Lily sent him a disgusted glare. "Way more awesome? Says who?"

"Ah, everyone?" Barney said, raising his eyebrow as if it was the most obvious thing in the world.

I chuckled. This dude was unbelievable.

"But seriously," Barney continued, turning back to Marshall. "You're _cheating_ on your girlfriend," he said again. "What's up with that?"

Maybe I should have realized back then, how much the subject of cheating bothered him.

"No, I'm not." Marshall told him, putting his arm over Lily's shoulder.

"Ah, yes. Yes, you are."

"No, he's not," said Lily, holding out her hand to Barney. "I'm Lily, by the way."

Barney shook it distractedly, while continud to argue. "Yes, he is, he's-"

But he stopped mid sentence, Lily's hand still in his. He looked at her, then looked at Marshall, then turned to look at me.

"Wait," he said, his eyes widening. He let go of her hand as if burned. I saw how the penny dropped. We all started to laugh hard, except for Barney who looked like he was hit by a bus.

"Oh, the look on your face," I cried my eyes out.

"Not funny, dudes," he said, offended.

"No, you're right," said Lily, giggling, "not funny, _hilarious_!"

"Shut up, Holly."

"It's Lily."

"Whatever, Libby"

" _Lily_."

"Lindy, gotcha," he chuckled to himself and turned to me. "Ted, I didn't expect from you to do something like that to your best friend-"

"I'm his best friend."

"Marshall's my best friend."

"But you know what, I forgive you. And I'm still going to teach you how to live."

" _You're_ going to teach _him_ how to live?" asked Lily in bewilderment.

"Duh, I'm awesome."

"Try weird, and pathetic."

" _You're_ weird and pathetic!"

They continued to argue for a while, but after a few more drinks we started talking about Star Wars, and realized we had more in common with the blonde guy than we first believed. It took another month before we invited Barney to our apartment and another two before he managed to drag us to a laser tag tournament. No matter how much we tried to get rid of him, he wouldn't give up, and after a while he became part of out little gang. And then, four years later, I asked him to meet me at the bar the night Marshall asked Lily to marry him. It was the night I saw your aunt Robin for the first time. Now that's a good story. Barney was trying to convince me to hook up with a Lebanese girl, who turned out to be Carl's girlfriend-

Oh, wait. I told you that story already, didn't I? Oh well, it _is_ a good story. So anyway, Marshall was cooking this fancy meal for Lily…


End file.
